Comfort Zones and Conversations
Happy 10th letter, yay!!! Previously, I wrote about how this year I am trying new things that are out of my comfort zone, like in “Why I Cut My Hair”. I go out of my comfort zone because I want to meet more people and experience different friendships. I realize that through going out of my comfort zone I won't become friends with everyone, and I will never leave my closest friends since they will always be there. However, I have met so many people lately who were right before my eyes which I can now call my true friends. It’s always been hard for me to make new friends that don’t have similar hobbies as me, but I have learned that it's actually not as hard as I may think it is. So, as Elsa says it, “into the unknown” we go!
Through learning to be more outgoing (click here to read more about “Introversion and Trust”), I have also learned that displaying confidence should be the goal. If you act confident in a conversation, you are naturally self-assured, calm, and make a place where worry can't live. This then acts as a chain reaction to the other person in the conversation as they feel more comfortable and reassured that the conversation is going well and both of you are having a good time. Along with confidence, a positive attitude is amazing! A positive attitude is more approachable to a person than a negative one. So, if you radiate positivity then not only will you be approachable but you will also have a great conversation! A positive attitude also degrades the worry and fear that come from inside of you and the unknown of the situation. If you change your mindset to a positive attitude and show optimism, what fear can stop you?
Everyone has been caught in conversations where there are awkward pauses and a lot of, “umms”. In these moments, I’ve learned that people absolutely love talking about themselves. So if all else fails then you should ask them about one of their interests, hobbies, or future plans. This gives you and the other person another topic to talk about besides topics like the weather. If you are like me and hate carrying the conversation, this tactic definitely takes the stress and worry off of your shoulders. By asking these questions, you can get to know the person better while making them feel valued because you are interested in what they love.
Making friends and starting a conversation will always be difficult for me, since it doesn't come naturally to me. However, I have made so much progress and I'm pretty proud of myself. I will always be an introvert at heart and worry about what people think of me, but taking confident and positive steps toward the unknown takes away the worry and fear. I'm so excited to see different people who I will meet in the future, but until then, I will keep taking small steps toward a good and joyful change of trying new things.